Bears vs. Colts, Behrens vs. Cook

Every day from now until Super Bowl XLI, Flak Magazine will publish an e-mail exchange between Andy Behrens (sports writer and dedicated Bears fan) and Bob Cook (sports writer and diehard Colts fan). Let the (pre)game begin.

Saturday, Feb. 3

FROM: Andy Behrens
TO: Bob Cook

So I've just happened upon this piece of fetid hooey on The Worldwide Leader's website. They rank every team that's ever participated in the Super Bowl, all 80 of 'em. Because apparently we all needed help sorting the '97 Packers from the '73 Vikings. And somehow they've determined that the '85 Bears were merely the second greatest Super Bowl team.

First of all, I think we can agree that ESPN's commitment to ranking things which never coexisted is both lazy and irrelevant. We used to eschew that sort of inane list-making at my high school paper. And secondly, I'd like to think we can also agree that the '85 Bears were not only the greatest football team of all-time, they were the greatest group of humans ever assembled for a common purpose.

How this irrefutable fact was lost on the editorial staff of ESPN.com, I really can't say. But I do know this: Page 2 is now like Reche Caldwell's eyelids to me. That is to say, they don't exist. They're dead to me. They're "Quite Frankly with Stephen A. Smith" to me. They're Mobile ESPN to me. They're Trev Alberts, "ESPN Hollywood," and Harold Reynolds to me. I'm finished with them.

Oh, boo hoo, sorry to hear your little heart is broken by ESPN's — and by extension, the world's — refusal to see the 1985 Bears as gods among men. Honestly, I would have put the 1978 Steelers, the 1989 49ers, the 1991 Redskins and the 1994 49ers ahead of them. That's mainly because the Bears had Jim McMahon, the Rex Grossman of his generation, at quarterback. True, he wasn't Good Jim/Bad Jim. It was more like Injured Jim/Not-Injured Jim.

On the subject of the 1985 Bears, let me add that you Bears fans are doing this 2006 team a grave disservice by fixating on that group. The local media is going overtime in comparing this team to the 1985 Bears, and finding the current Bears lacking. Every '85 Bear is crawling, gingerly, out of the woodwork to comment on the 2006 team, and whether it is better than the 1985 Bears. (Short answer: no.) OK, 1985 was great, but IT'S OVER! Enjoy your current Bears. Unless you're so worried they'll lose, you don't want to let go of the old Bears. This group of Bears has to feel like everybody is saying to them, "You're all right, but your daddy was a lot better."

The 1985 Bears don't have to worry. Even if the current Bears win the Super Bowl, there are plenty of supermarket openings and church picnics for everybody.