The Ads of Super Bowl XLII

"The Telltale Heart" | CareerBuilder.com

Summary: A pounding heart jumps out of a woman’s chest, lands on her computer keyboard, quits her job for her and walks out.

High Point: It’s alive — and walking!

Low Point: Formulaic conclusion, with CareerBuilder.com logo falling on top of place of employment. Can we save the piling on for the game?

Is this commercial an agent of change? Yes and no. Yes, she quits her job. No, she didn’t sign the COBRA form that will let her continue her health insurance.

"Lounge Lizards" | SoBe Life Water

Summary: Supermodel takes a sip of Life Water, lizard gets a drop from her lips. Suddenly the place is jumping with lizards, and they all start dancing like it’s a rehearsal for the “Thriller” music video.

High Point: Lizards have hips!

Low Point: The Lizards make the supermodel look like a reject from the Solid Gold Dancers with Denny Terrio.

Is this commercial an agent of change? Can we finally all agree that supermodels should stick to what they do best: supermodeling and throwing up in the ladies’ room?

"It’s Hard Out Here for a Drug Dealer | TheAntiDrug.com

Summary: Creepy looking guy outside convenience store says sales are down because kids are getting high on stuff in the household medicine cabinet.

High Point: I went to high school with that guy!

Low Point: Cough syrup abuse is a gateway drug leading to Iron Butterfly addiction.

Is this commercial an agent of change? Yes. Cough syrup abuse skyrockets once White House formally declares its opposition.