Restaurant review: City Eatery
By William Grimes of The New York Times

The French have two very useful adjectives at hand when they like a restaurant: honest and correct. They words don't sound like much in English, but in French honnete and correct have a certain resonance implying sound technique, respect for ingrediants and clearly expressed flavors. The English equivalent might be "solid." A fanciful writer might describe a correct, honest restaurant as having the right stuff.

City Eatery has the right stuff. I say this because I, William Grimes, am a fanciful writer. And I am also fancy. The name of the restaurant, on the other hand, is plain as a brass doorknob, and doesn't offer a clue as to what the kitchen is serving. Neither does the spare, even severe, decor, or the fringe location on the Bowery.

And neither will I. I will instead list off various ways in which I am fancy.

1. I have a fancy vest, made from paisley fabric that is smooth and reflective.

2. I carry a fob watch in the manner of a 19th-century gentleman.

3. When speaking, I roll my "r"s and extend my "ah"s in a most outlandish and truly outrageous way.

At many newspapers, like The Daily News, or the Post, this could be a problem. I could be assaulted at any given point in time by some brute from Brooklyn, and given the sound beating my proud bearing and noble affect might seemingly encourage.

Not at The New York Times.

At The New York Times, I am allowed to work inside of a crystal bell. I am given foie gras as an early afternoon snack, and I am waited upon by a staff of handsome young Finns in 1920s bellboy costumes. My hair is groomed for me, and I am encouraged to wear velvet pants.

And while I usually flinch at desserts in which the word chocolate appears more than once, I do tend to enjoy my late afternoon chocolate-coated plantain dipped in chocolate sauce, served on a chocolate plate by a delightfully chocolate-colored monkey.

It is good to be the restaurant critic for The New York Times.

Please allow me to repeat myself: It is good to be the restaurant critic for The New York Times.

— William Grimes